the breaking of a dream

those that know me-know me to be aiming for CSE 2011.
those that know me better,suspect i may have attempted CSE 2010 on the sly..
those that know me best,know despite all the talk of CSE 2011 being the eventual target,i would not while away time till then and give a jolly good crack in 2010 itself.patience is not after all my strongest suit...
so whats the situation-two months away,cleared prelimns,and study wise uncertain.
this mind you is the common condition of each and every aspirant-from topper to pauper,at this stage..whats all the breaking dream stuff then?(i did i must admit clear the prelimns,dint i?)

each and every fellow aspirant take note-no matter what you do,no matter what you plan,no mattter how hard you work,
life has a knack of (pardon my language) SCREWING YOU UP!
life was difficult as i lay grappling with delhi sultanate with a fromidable mughals to follow suit(and political science yelling for its share of attention!) when hell broke loose.
we had to change houses in a jiffy(and off went my broadband and landline!!!)
my father met with an accident (rather serious-bed rest for two months after 10 days in hospital)
and that at a time my dear sister had been home for her delivery........

ouch!!!
tried shuttling from hospital to gynaec to new house(to make it move-in able) to old house (to settle the dues,etc)????????
its maddening!
it means no books for a month and half.
it means lagging behind in studies,as others zoom by on nitro boosters.
it means your prelimn result too is passed on by a concerned friend.
means that since you lost the last date,your university denies you admission next year though you topped last year(not even on humanitarian grounds!)
shifting houses means your copy of mains form goes missing.
i can go on and on..............

all in all,
it means life has taught me another precious lesson.
its not over till the fat lady sings buddies!!!!!!!
use the time you have in hand in present.dont like me plan and plan in the present,and lose the future to a quirk of fate.
my dream for this year lies in shambles.
no,i have not given up,how can i???i put in too much effort to lose hope.
i will soldier on-though life may break my heart,break my bones-it will never break my spirit.
i will give it a good whack-like dhoni in powerplays when the innings just about to end.
though pretty personal,i shared this for the sole reason to show,you need not neccessarily have to do something stupid to lose in the race for CSE....
sometimes the sole victory lies in dusting off despair and soldiering on.......

to those that are better placed this year for mains-go for it guys!!!!its a chance of a lifetime...never will life remain the same....its time to put in all you have!all the very best!